15条比段子还好笑的沙雕新闻，第一条就笑喷了哈哈哈哈哈哈哈

01

求助：男友沉迷网游怎么办？

Help: What about boyfriends obsessed with netting?

吐小曹不打游戏，可以考虑一下吗？

If you don't play games with Tsao, can you think about it?

02

没有哪个男生能够拒绝

no man can refuse

这车好是好，就是开门不方便，得扭屁股。

This car is good, it's not easy to open, it's got to shake your ass.

03

孩子别这样

{\bord0\shad0\alphaH3D}Don't be like that. {\bord0\shad0\alphaH3D}

猪肉太贵咱赔不起

We can't afford pork if it's too expensive.

04

为了你我搭上一年的积蓄

{\bord0\shad0\alphaH3D}I've spent a year saving for you.

澳门你至少知道自己是怎么输

At least you know how you lost in Macau.

比特币让你哭的没道理

{\bord0\shad0\alphaH3D}Bitcoin makes no sense to make you cry.

有没有玩比特币的朋友

Do you have friends playing with bitcoin?

你在币圈混的怎么样

How are you doing with the coins?

05

后院起火

Back yard fire

所以很多球员上场的时候都带家属坐前排

So a lot of players take their families in the front row when they're on the field.

06

一看也是走过南闯过北了

{\bord0\shad0\alphaH3D}It looks like it's coming through the south.

这些地方是卖酒吗，为什么这些地方吐小曹一个没听说过？

Do these places sell wine? Why haven't they ever heard of Tsao?

07

实力辣眼睛

/strang'

热是热了点，不过还是建议多穿点，别受风。

It's hot, but it's better to wear it better than the wind.

08

爱的魔力转圈圈

♪ The magic of love turns around ♪ ♪/strong ♪

画个圈圈诅咒你

Draw a circle and curse you.

09

我觉得这样的广告我才会多看两眼

I think that's the kind of ad I'm going to look at.

刚好最近老板的朋友需要做一个广告位招租的海报（估计是不会付钱的那种），于是就学着做了类似的。嗯，被打回了，在重做……

Recently, a friend of the boss needed to make a poster for an advertising spot (which probably won't pay for it), so he learned to do the same. Well, he was beaten back and he's doing it again; & hellip; & hellip;

10

这才是粽子正确的打开方式！

That's the right way to open a hammer!

痛风快乐餐

Happy gourmet meal.

11

这P图技术什么时候可以开一个班

When can this pigram technology start a class?

教练，我想学P图

Coach, I'd like to study P.D.

12

小姑娘还真是可爱

The little girl's so cute.

这裙子太方便了

This dress is so convenient.

上厕所时是要拿在手里吗？

Do you want it in your hand when you go to the bathroom?

13

卖鞋都卖出前妻了？

Did you sell your ex-wife?

且不说200的鞋子质量咋样，这个反击也是没谁了

Not to mention the quality of 200 shoes. There's no one left to fight back.

14

一个微胖女孩的小秘密

大腿还不能全放在凳子上

The thighs can't all be on the stool.

不然肉肉会散开

Or the meat will spread.

15

姓别的孩子怎么取名

what's the name of another child?

别龙马

Don't be a dragon horse.

16

这个蛋糕有点潦草了

This cake's a little rusty.

小孩收到流下了感动的眼泪，不过确实挺靓的

The child received moving tears, but it was pretty.

17

请问阿姨你家还有女儿吗？

Do you have a daughter at your house?

我愿意做你家上门女婿

I'd like to be your son-in-law.

18

看过昨天的内容

read yesterday's contents

你就知道这图应该倒过来看

♪ Strong ♪ ♪ You knew this was supposed to be backwards ♪ ♪/ strong ♪

底裤细节略微不足

There's a little bit of detail on the underpants.

来自于吐小槽新闻

It's from the nastiness news.

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